Staying Tight on a Tight Budget Family Trip

By no means have my family and I managed to have a completely successful trip, but we have managed to come back home every time without killing each other.

An envelope labeled “Europe” sat in a stationary box until I was 17, when I finally got to use the funds I was saving on a trip to infamous World War II sites. I had been dreaming of going abroad (to Europe, especially, because it was more popular in the media) for so long, but it was not something my family could afford. We traveled within Florida a few times a year and took the occasional trip outside the state, but traveling was not a critical part of our family life. That is until I began traveling more frequently on my own or with friends, financial situations evolved, and my family wanted to join me on international trips.

But trips with my family have not gone without it’s terrible times. Traveling with family is especially difficult when there is a tight, specific budget to follow. By no means have my family and I managed to have a completely successful trip, but we have managed to come back home every time without killing each other. So, here are tips I’ve developed along the trials and tribulations of budget family travel.

1. Everyone needs to participate in the planning process. I love any opportunity to travel plan whether it’s for myself or other people. So when my family has asked to join my trips and have me plan them, I was game. However, this became a severe point of tension for myself, because instead of enjoying what I had planned, I found myself concerned with how my family was enjoying the activities. Additionally, it became a point of tension from my family—if something went wrong, like improper navigation or our hotel room being dated and musty, it was easy to point a finger at me. In future trips, each of us will have a role in the trip planning process so we can share responsibility over the good and the bad.

2. Plan for things everyone likes and keep in mind the family does not have to do everything together. When planning trips with family, I had asked them “What are some ‘must see’ and ‘must do’ things you would like me to plan for?” This seemed like a perfect way to ensure everyone is pleased with the itinerary. Wrong. There is always something planned someone else will not enjoy, so of course plan for things everyone will like if possible, but don’t exempt sights you’re looking forward to most for the sake of family peace. Instead, go on your own or with a few members of the family while the rest partake in another activity they would enjoy. A family trip does not mean everything has to be done as a family. This leads to the next tip.

Time to be without each other will help ease any tensions from being in each other’s constant presence.

3. Plan for time apart. Deliberately plan for time for everyone to be alone with themselves. In budget travel, you may all be cramped into one uncomfortable room with no space of your own. You may be in vehicles together for long periods of time. Close and frequent proximity leads to tension between family members that can only be moderated by opportunities for space. You can plan for activities that allow you all to be alone (see Tip #2) or designate specific times of the day to do something solo. Everyone can do breakfast or lunch on their own in separate restaurants in town, or everyone takes a walk by themselves after dinner. Time to be without each other will help ease any tensions from being in each other’s constant presence.

4. Talk about the pros and cons daily. The only way to reduce tension is to talk about it. Too often my family and I would bottle up our feelings, then explode on each other. This release of frustration would then cause even more tension than what we were originally stressed about. After everyone has time to decompress (see Tip #3), use this restorative time to openly communicate with each other calmly. Plan for a specific time in the day to talk with each other about what everyone enjoyed and what everyone did not care for—the activities or each other. Applying this time for reflection can be a solution and preventative measure for tension in your family vacation.

5. Now is not the time to fix each other. Regular travel stress related to being around each other most of the day, sharing a temporary living space, and navigating an unfamiliar place are already engrained in the trip. While tips like these can reduce the stress, there is no need for additional stress on top of that. So, that issue about your mom that has been bothering you for a decade, the quirks of your brother that get on your nerves, the habits of your cousin that drive you insane are all things you should NOT try to remedy on your trip. Save that for a family retreat or your holiday dinner or maybe NEVER, but during a family trip, avoid any unnecessary drama making it into the mix of your itinerary.

Without complete transparency of the budget and spending, additional tension can arise related to money.

6. Be honest about the budget. Whether one or two people are sponsoring the trip or everyone is contributing their share of the expenses, talking about how much money is to be spent is important in keeping peace. The budget should be openly discussed during the joint planning process (see Tip #1) without any reservations; discuss exactly how much money you are willing to spend for specific expenses like flights and accommodations, and in total. Also discuss how you would like to pay for things in advance—one person is paying and the rest will pay back at the end of the trip, everyone is taking turns making purchases, or everyone is splitting each expense, for example. Without complete transparency of the budget and spending, additional tension can arise related to money. Be upfront about expenses and consider revisiting the budget when debriefing the day with family so adjustments can me made once again, if necessary.

Pro Tip: Use Google Sheets to track expenses and the itinerary, which can be shared and used collaboratively between each traveling family member. This helps with a visual means of communicating desired activities and the expenses related to the total budget.